Cruise Review: Ventura Caribbean 13th – 28th February 2009

Has it really only been 8 weeks since we returned from the winter Wonderland cruise? It seems like a long distant memory. And now here we are about to embark on something which is a complete contrast to the ice cold climes of the Fjords and Baltic in December.

Tomorrow we fly to the Barbados to join Ventura for her Paradise Isles cruise.

The planning of the packing etc has been like a military operation. As someone who doesn’t normally choose a fly cruise I have been paranoid about the weight restrictions for luggage. How was I going to fit all my essential items into 23kg of suitcase? Well, 3 weeks last Saturday I decided to get all of my clothes and shoes that I would like to take on this cruise out of the wardrobe. I looked around the room and decided that no way would all that lot fit into one case and weigh under 23kg only one way to find out and that was to pack it. So that’s what I did, I carefully folded and packed and placed little items all around the edges of the case. Well, it all went in, but how much does it weigh? 21kg, I’ve cracked it. Ok makeup etc needed to go in but Mr C should have plenty of room in his case for things like that judging by what I have just rammed into mine. As I say there is still 3 weeks before the cruise so I stood and unpacked again and hung everything back up around the room, that highly amused my daughter and confirmed to her that Mums do the strangest things! A week later I decided I couldn’t stand the mess in the room with all these clothes hanging about, so I decided to pack! Well there is only two weeks to departure now, lol. Both cases were packed. I have everything I need, plus some spare outfits. I have the same even mix of cocktail dresses and smart casual dresses for the evenings plus my 4 formal dresses. I know I only need to take smart casual wear, but I prefer to dress up not down. I have more shoes than I could have hoped for and a good range of accessories and evening bags etc. Ive also packed Mr C’s snorkelling gear and fins and they were not light! Over the next few days I am constantly adding little must haves to the cases. You know the sort of things that don’t weigh anything. Ive just folded my four long dresses into the top of one case and Mr C’s white tux into the top of the other, but oh dear, the weight has crept up ever so slightly. How did that happen? I wonder what sort of reaction I will get tomorrow at check in if I decided to go with it? Im going to have to wait and find out, because the hassle of looking through the cases to see what I don’t need doesn’t bear thinking about.

Friday 13^th February 2009

Well, so much for being super organised. Im still not organised to be in bed before midnight, and I’d not been in bed five minues and already I have remembered something I need to pack. That plays on my mind for the best part of the next hour then I must have drifted off to sleep. At 3.00am I am wide awake, so I had better get up and remember what I have forgotten. In fact I have forgotten three things but by the time I am down stairs I have already forgotten what one of them is. Old age! Mr C pulls himself out of bed at 5 and and 5.45 we are on the road en route to East Midlands Airprort.

My tummy is going through hoops. I don’t think it’s excitement I think its filled with the dread of the whole process of actually getting to the ship.

30 mins later we are at the airport and so the process begins. Remember I am not used to flying or fly cruising. We had parked the car with Prestige which is ‘walking distance’ to the terminal. Lets just say it’s a good job it wasn’t snowing or raining. We went through the doors into Departures and it was deserted, but oh, wait a minute, there is a queue, that must be P&O and sure enough it was!

We had arrived about 4 and half hours pre flight but we only stood chatting to the couple in front for about 30 minutes and we were checking in. Why the heck did I worry and constantly weigh my suitcase? Many people had obviously done this before and some of the cases were huge. 23kg my ass! We checked in, my cases were over and nothing was said, although they did get a big read ‘heavy sticker’ applied to them. We could have had 3 pieces of hand luggage each because nobody asked or checked. Onto security and a very nice security lady decided she would do a random search of my handbag, lol, I think she was beginning to wonder how much stuff I had fitted into all the pockets and compartments of my sport billy bag! Well, it amused her and I understood she was only doing her job. Another lady wasn’t quite so obliging when she was selected for a search and was most p’d off when her washing line was confiscated! I kid you not.

We had booked the Executive lounge for our time at the airport and oh thank heavens we did. East Mids has a few shops but not enough to keep me occupied, and the seating was not looking too comfortable. We were greeted with a lovely welcoming smile in the exec lounge and told to help ourselves to drinks etc. I needed my breakfast so I helped myself to a large vodka and diet coke and a fruit n fibre bar. Delicious!! The next 3 hours or so passed pretty much the same. I think I had a slice of lemon cake with one vodka and some crackers with another. A large brandy in coffee also went down very well.

The lounge was very quiet and relaxing away from the maddening crowd and well worth the £15 it cost us. We were watching the screen for our departure but it just kept telling us to ‘shop and relax’ me and Amanda did try but there really wasn’t much retail therapy choice. However we let the boys out for 5 minutes and Mr C came back with a new camcorder! And they say women are bad.

What seemed like all of a sudden we were being called to the gate, but we slipped in another drink thinking we only needed to go to the foot of the stairs? Wrong, when we eventually decided to go to gate (when they announced boarding) it was miles away up and down stairs and along a long wing. But relax, when we got there, there was a massive queue. You see that’s what I don’t like, queue to check in, queue to board, queue queue queue!

We were allocated row 8 in the plane and that was 3 rows away from Premium which was divided only by a curtain.  They hadn’t even started the safety announcement and Mr C had closed his eyes and started to snore. Try as I might I could not wake him to listen to the briefing, he just grunted. I had better pay attention then as he certainly isn’t going to save me. We haven’t even levelled out and the bloke behind starts snoring his brains out! Flippin heck, this isn’t the exciting romantic start that imagined. From what I can see in premium class they only have larger tv screens to shout about. In actual fact they have about 3″ extra leg room but our 33″ pitch is perfectly adequate’ also they have more choice of TV chanels and they can stop start and pause, whereas we have to watch from where ever it is in the programme when we turn over and the films are rather limited, but you can upgrade to the same TV chanels for £5. oh and they have headsets as apposed to earpieces. And they had a glass of fizz before take off.

Within an hour im bored. Ive tried the TV but its not for me. Dr Who is showing on drama, Brideshead Revisited is the film and ive seen the lifestyle cookery programme. It’s a beautiful sunny day outside and for ages I could see the fields and a bit of snow. We went up over Liverpool and then Ireland and than across the Atlantic. Don’t know why people worry about the Atlantic, it looked as flat as a pancake to me.

Drinks are flowing quite regularly. I had a couple of vodkas the first time he passed. Lunch seemed like and eternity away and Premium class got served a good hour before us. My heart sank when she put the tray down as the main course said chicken in mustard glaze and I just cant stomach mustard, but Mr C assured me you couldn’t taste the mustard and he was right. It was all very tasty and even the tea at the end was nice. I also managed to slip in a couple of glasses of chardonnay.

I tried the tv again and this time tried doing the ‘who wants to be a millionaire’ quiz. No, I cant concentrate and keep forgetting to use my lifelines. Ooh and that’s another thing, considering P&O want to reduce the risk of norivirus im not impressed with the cleanliness of the table, seat Back and touch screen TV. Good job I had a wet one to wipe it down.

We are coming upto 5 hours into the flight now and jeepers im bored. I already have nicknames for a few people around me. I was having a snoozle and could feel my head snapping off my neck (you know the feeling) then all of a sudden I heard ‘Any drinks please’ ooh the drinks trolley has arrived again. Can I have a large Baileys please flowed out of my lips before my eyes had even opened! She looked a bit gobsmacked at first as she had to send out for more Baileys but then I ended up with 3 bottles, lol. My mini bar is coming along nicely! Well, I do feel at the moment that P&O owes me one or two drinks!

The stewardesses handing out drinks were chatting about ‘feeling a presence onboard’ the one felt as if she had been tapped on the shoulder twice and the other one was in the galley earlier and turned to speak to a gentleman who wasn’t actually there! I wonder what that is all about? I will keep my eyes peeled and see if I spot any spirits. Wonder if he will come on the ship with us? You would think so wouldn’t you? He must be here for a reason whoever he is?

Lets have a look at the inflight info and see how much further we have to go? Dam its its gone off and needs a reboot. Last time I looked we were about a third of the way there, its now 20 to 5 uk time and I think we are due to arrive 10 to 8 UK time so, oh heck there is hours to go yet.

Amanda has just popped down for a natter so that has past best part of 40 minutes away. They have had an exciting game of eyespy, but nothing much else has happened. Amanda trys to convince me that this is a good flight experience but im still not convinced. Why people like flying is beyond me. Lap top is going away now so next bit will be reported from onboard the big white shiny Ventura!

As we approached Barbados we flew straight over Ventura, back to back with a sister Princess ship, and being the ships anorak that I am I could also identify the Braemar, but the other ship had me beat. Turned out it was Island Star so know wonder I didn’t recognise it, as its not really a cruise ship to me!

We landed at 5 to 4 Barbados time only to be told that we had arrived at the same time as another plane load of P&O passengers so we had to wait while they were put into coaches. Thankfully we were near to the exit doors so we were soon down the steps and in the hot Caribbean sunshine, not for long though as we stepped straight onto a small coach and whisked off to the ship. We had just been told to expect a transfer time of one hour but our drivers was taking no prisoners and anything that dared to get in his way or attempt to get in front of him was more or less bumpered out of the way. In little over 30 mins we were checking in and stepping onboard the ship. Phew, door to door that was hell of a long journey.

No assistance to cabins, not that I needed or wanted anything and we were straight into our new home for two weeks. Wow the cabin is huge. I love it, and the balcony is massive, but more about that later. I dug out some summer clothes straight away and we were straight upto Breakers Bar for that ice cold drink in the sun that I have been dreaming off all day. It went down very quickly, so that was followed by two very nice and aptly named ‘Caribbean Cruise’ they have sorted me out and despite it being 11.00pm at home im not tired.

Back in the cabin I unpack the hand luggage but I do something really weird. I always sleep on the right of the bed and yet I unpacked and set the room up with all my stuff on the left of the bed. I cant be bothered to change it so I will have to see how I get on with life on the other side.

Rendevouz in Metropolis Bar at 7.30pm so I slip in a nice Belini followed by a Pimms cup as its London night. Ahhh its good to be back.

Dinner tonight is in the Bay Tree for all arriving Friday passengers. Tables are not reserved but certain flight numbers are allocated either early or late. We were one of the later flights in so we are allocated 8.30 sitting. It was hard work getting a lift outside Metropolis as most passengers seemed to have left their manners behind and get to every lift before us and make sure we cant get in. We got down to Bay Tree and there was a little bit of a queue while people were waiting to be taken to tables. The old lady behind us threw a fit when someone came down the stairs and joined the people in front of us. I tried to explain to her that the men had walked while the ladies took a lift, but she was having none of it. Honestly some people! Its not as if they were going to run out of food. Then a snooty lady piped up “this is ridiculous, get me an officer with stripes” well I just had to laugh, who the hell do some people think they are? I don’t want you getting the impression we were in this queue for 20 minutes or something, we were actually there for probably just over one minute.

It was the usual fist night menu (oh dear do I do this too often?) fan of melon, mushroom soup, roast pork or lasagne. All very nice. Mr C cant keep his dam eyes open. How much sleep does he want? He spent most of the 9 hours on the plane asleep. So hes off to bed. The rest of us retire to Red Bar for a quiet drink, and turn in at gone midnight. That’s over 25 hrs I have been up for today.

Back at the cabin the cases have arrived so I unpack mine and climb into bed. I open my Bon Voyage card from a very good friend who I know wishes she was here. Never mind Im sure I can have a few drinks for her.

Im being a rebble tonight and sleeping with the balcony door wide open. I know you’re not supposed to and the Engineers would tell me off for messing up the air con, but I cant stand the thought of getting aircon cough and throat so soon so fresh air it is.

Saturday 14^th February ~ Valentines Day in Barbados

Its dark and im wide awake. Dare I look at the clock? Im feeling like its 8.00am but im guessing its not? Correct its 4.00am, oh no! im going to be tired if I don’t get back to sleep. Try as I might I just cant do it, so we are up sorting the room out, unpacking Mr C’s case and drinking tea. Royal Clipper came in at about 5.00am in the dark and all light up. One day I will get back on her.

The sun came up at 6 and im just hoping those clouds move away. My plan for today is to go ashore, find a nice beach and fall asleep for the morning, a nice light lunch and then back to the ship to await the Saturday arrivals.

Well we ashore fairly early and it didn’t seem like 5 minutes since we were last in Barbados Duty Free area. Everything looks just the same, but we are too early for most shops, lol.

The taxi drivers are all touting for business left right and centre and it can get a bit much with them all heckling you. We tell one, Thomas,that we quite fancy Mullins Beach and he tells us he already has a couple waiting to go there, but he has to find some others to fill his mini bus and off he goes again. We know the more he finds the better our fare will be but the wait in the heat is quite painful. We give him plenty of stick, in a friendly way, and tell him to hurry up. Eventually after much jumping in and out of his seat we eventually get on the road. We have to drop a few at Holetown but why anyone would want to go there is beyond me, its just a Columbian Emeralds and a few gift shops. It was ok as somewhere to walk to the times I stayed in Barbados but not for a special journey out – just my opinion. Mullins Bay was only a short distance from here on the way to Speightstown. The beach was very close to the road and m initial reaction wasn’t good. Probably a bit too commercialised for me, but it was a nice bay, one nice bar and restaurant and very comfy looking beach chairs. We found our spot and I lay on the comfiest sunlounger ever! Thick padded mattresses, just what I needed for a good snooze. We were instructed to put our flag out when we wanted a drink, ooh very civilisied. We thought the prices would be a little OTT for the service but they weren’t that bad at all.

There weren’t that many people using the beach but what I didn’t like was the amount of jet skis and being asked if we wanted to go see the turtles etc, but having said that, they all only asked the once and then they left us alone. Mr C went off messing about in the water, as he does while I just laid there in total comfort, sometimes making it off my chair to walk into the sea to cool down and then lay back down with another cooling drink. We had wanted to go to a nice restaurant we had read about just round the coast, but we were told it was about a 20 minute walk away and that just seemed like miles in this heat. A jet ski operator offered to take us round there for $60 but that would have made it one heck of an expensive lunch. Instead we decided to stay put and dine in the very attractive looking restaurant on the beach. We were made very welcome and given a lovely table overlooking the sea.

It was perfect. We had the most wonderful lunch in perfect surroundings and washed it all down with a Mullins speciality cocktail. Just time for an afternoon nap on my lounger before Thomas collected us at 2.30pm as promised. He even bought Mr C a beer while he was waiting for some others to turn up.

We arrived back at the ship and had to go through the shore side security. We were amazed to find that we had arrived at exactly the same time as Karen and John & Co were just checking in from there Birmingham flight. They looked a lot fresher than I thought I did this time yesterday.

So it was straight upto Breakers Bar for us all. I got my sun lounger while they sat and drank (ok I might have had a cocktail of the day!) Mr C decided to show Mr Flowers where the pizzeria was and they came back laden with pizza’s etc. why Mr C needed more food after what he had eaten at lunch time is beyond me, but then why did  decide to try a piece of pizza too? Oh how I wish I hadn’t! Anchovy and fish paste, oh how they laughed when they seen me nearly choke on it. I couldn’t swallow it, and I had to dash around the corner until a tissue could be found. It was disgusting and I cant recommend it. The shock of it sent me to my cabin for a lie down.

We dined at our table in the BayTree Restaurant tonight. Table 112, and oval table that seats 10. I cant say I was over impressed with the service but hey it’s the first night. Afterwards we went to the Red Bar and Stan behind the bar has suddenly recognised me despite the fact that I sat right infront of him last night, I guess I must have looked really rough! We weren’t too late into bed. Everyone is still tired.

Sunday 15^th February 2009 ~ At Sea

Im so tired but as usual im wide awake early at 6.00am in fact. Mr C knew this would happen and has ordered breakfast for 6.30 to 7.00am, but at 20 to 7 I give up and head for my sunlounger. Oh how I love this time of day up on top deck. The sun is just rising at port side aft and there isn’t a sole up on deck apart from a little army of deckhands who are sweeping and mopping and wiping everything in sight. I confess I did expect to see rows of reserved sunloungers but I had the pick of every single one. I just had my usual one. Apparenty breakfast turned up at just gone 7 and I missed hot toast that was hot enough to butter  dam! Never mind Mr C bought me up a blueberry muffin and some fresh orange juice.

I love people watching and their habbits. Slowly the deck starts to wake up. One lady decided to have a right go at one of the deck hands because there wasn’t a walking track up there. He tried to direct her to deck 7 but she made it quite clear she didn’t want to go to deck 7. she then proceeded to march around the front of sun deck, back through the little chicane and around the back of the stage area so she seemed to zoom past my chair every 90 seconds. Another couple turned up and took the loungers at the end of my row, placed the books and towels in suitable positions and then went across to the bar steward who was setting up Breakers bar and asked him to keep an eye on her bags while she went fro breakfast! I know what I would have told her to do. All in all there wasn’t that much reserving of sun loungers going on, and there will still seats to be had later on in the morning. I thought the bar was never going to open. It took him forever to set up and by 9.00am it felt like I was stranded on a desert with a mirage of a bar infront of me. They weren’t fast in coming forward to offer drinks when they did declare themselves open, so Mick ended going to the bar for my 9.00am cocktail of the day. The morning passed with what seemed like a zillion announcements for any sort of excuse that P&O could think of. Meal times, shop opening times, cruise fitness suggestions, pool quiz, noon announcement, oh deary me, tone it down a bit P&O, I might as well be on a Carnival cruise.

A morning in the hot blazing sunshine is enough for me and at 1230 we pack up our belongings to go for some lunch. If only all passengers were so considerate and did the same when they went off for lunch. I returned to the cabin to find an army of stewards and two officers sorting out the bad smells coming from the bathroom drains, im sure it would have only took one woman to do the same pouring of bleach, but you know what men are like!

Pre lunch drinks in the Exchange and how lovely it is to be able to enjoy a drink in here. It’s a lovely room. We take lunch in the Cavern at Ramblas and I think our reputation goes before us, when we ordered a bottle of wine the headwaiter came over and suggested that one wouldn’t be enough. The cost of lunch in Ramblas hasn’t changed – £5 for 3 courses or the 3 tapas choices for £2.50. we had the 3 course lunch and we all thoroughly enjoyed it. I had ham and figs followed by the most delicious Seville chicken, I chose a side dish of salad and I really enjoyed it. The wine flowed nicely and we stayed for speciality coffees.

Someone has thrown down the gauntlet to a quoits challenge at 3.00pm, we might as well have attached our selves to a spit and roasted ourselves. OMG I thought I was going to pass out and the sun was just burning into my neck and shoulders. One game of the Chadwicks and Crosslands V’s Flowers and Robinsons was enough for us but we emerged victorious.

Can you believe that we went completely the wrong way back to the cabin and ended up at the aft instead of forward, we stopped by the photo gallery and I was surprised to see that our embarkation photo was actually quite nice, it didn’t make me want to buy it though. I did have my picture taken with Mr Bump though who I thought looked a bit angry.

Back in the cabin I have a little work to catch up with but it isn’t long before im under the duvet. Oh it was hard work waking up. I must have woke up 10 times but couldn’t convince myself to get out of bed. Darren had already phoned to arrange to meet pre dinner so I knew I had to get out of bed and make the effort.

Captains Cocktail reception tonight and as I don’t like cocktail party’s in Havana because of the room layout we attend the Atrium one. They didn’t start serving drinks until dead on 8.15pm. the steel band were playing in the atrium, but dont know why they choose to play hymns. We stood around looking for Darren but he never appeared, there weren’t very many officers in attendance at all and those that were there didn’t mix.

Captain Alistair Clark welcomed us all onboard but there was non of the usual meet the officers, so it was all a bit of an anti climax and we left shortly afterwards and made our way to the restaurant. I wast best pleased when I arrived at the table and had to start relaying it. The waiters had been told to lay it up for 9 and not 10, which is what they had done, but all they had effectively done is taken away the 10^th place setting and left the chair and empty place at the table. We all sat and waited for our host to arrive, but he never made it which was a bit disappointing as he had been given such a big build up. I knew there must be some sort of crisis going on though and he just couldn’t get there. Service wasn’t brilliant again tonight, very hit and miss and when im tired I get ratty, so thought it best to leave and go and do some work at my laptop. On the way out  had a word with the section waiter but I new he wasn’t on the same planet as me when he kept saying he would have a word with our waiters, but he hadn’t even asked me what the problem was! That made me even more cross as I walked away. I bumped into restaurant manager up on deck 7 and he said he couldn’t understand it as they were both experienced waiters and usually very good, but I know for sure that they will be 100% better tomorrow.

Im soon caught up with a bit of work and meet the other up in Metropolis. Flippin heck what have they done up here. I love this bar but they have the loudest, pub singer duo on in the world. You cant hear yourself think let alone talk. Why we stopped for two drinks is beyond me. We tried to get the waiters to go and cut the wires or pull the plug but they wouldn’t. The room was dead and they must know they are loosng custom in here. The bar area is totally empty and people are walking in and walking out again. The waiters are all tripping on something tonight, the one of them had us in stitches and the next one was almost as funny. The 15 minute break from the duo was like heaven on earth but the peace was soon shattered again and they were back to murder some more tunes, so we left.

There was plenty going on around the ship. Masquarades was on in the theatre, there was a packed ball in Tamarind and they all looked to be enjoying, and a Neil Diamond tribute act was on in Havana, oh and quiz and karaoke in the Exchange. We headed for a nightcap in Red Bar and yes the waiter in there was nuts too. He decided that Mr C was Micks son and that Mr C worked on the ship because he is always onboard. I was not best pleased when he suggested I was Mr C’s mother! Me and Mick were tying ourselves in knots trying to keep up the pretence. After about 30 minutes we took the hint that they wanted to close, the bar was being wiped down, the blinds went up and tables were cleared, so we headed for bed.

Monday 16^th February 2009 ~ Antigua

6.00am and we are both awake again. The sail into Antigua was picture perfect all the way. Probably my favourite Caribbean island. We have a lot planned for today so need to crack on and get some breakfast.

We are ashore very early and have to run the gauntlet through the taxi drivers ‘ you wanna go to the beach’ trouble is saying No isn’t and option as Mr C is carrying his fins and snorkel gear. I found it easier to walk on the other side and nobody harassed me, lol. The duty free shops weren’t open and the stalls were just opening up, we just had the briefest of looks and then stumbled across Charlie. He was no messing ‘where do you wanna go’ “Darkwood Beach followed by Nelsons Dockyard please” $80 and I will stay with you all day. Perfect, good price, no haggling, no hard sell on we will go here there and everywhere, and whats even better is when we got in his nice air conditioned people carrier he just drove the thing instead of ratting away all the way there. Bless him when we go to the beach he just told us to go and enjoy and have as long as we wanted there and he would sit and wait.

Dark Wood was just how I like it, deserted! Not a soul around. The boss lady had only just turned up as we got there. The sea was being a little bit fierce today with some big waves rolling in, but we had soon put footprints in the sand and I watched as the others tackled the sea. They all coached me in, but it was scary stuff to me with the odd wave threatening to go over my head. Getting out of the sea was a challenge, much to the others amusement. The rays from the sun were intense today and I had to cover my back and shoulders because they were frazzling. The rum punch was just hitting the right spot and cooling us down nicely. The morning passed with pretty much the same pattern of paddle in the sea, rum punch, paddle in the sea rum punch. Later in the morning a party of 4 couples arrived at the beach, oh no, who told them this was here? People on my beach. I must stop publicising it in my blogs.

We had decided to leave at around 11.30 anyway so we got ourselves sorted and went back out to Charlie and his van. Charlie was great, he took us everywhere we could have wanted to go, through the rainforest, up to Shirley heights and lots of photo opportunities on the way.

Nelsons Dockyard was worth the visit, what a lovely setting, Nelson did well! We went to Admirals Inn for lunch and what a perfect find. We stay outside under the cool trees and alongside the waters edge. Dolly the waitress was a character, one of those priceless little finds that you stumble across every now and then. We could see there was a large A frame blackboard on the courtyard but Mick asked to see the menu, so what did she do? She went and got the large A frame blackboard and dragged it down into the garden for us mumbling ‘Ive been doing this for 28 years so and extra day aint going to make much difference. Oh priceless! The choice of food wasn’t great but what came was delicious. I had club sandwich and fries, Mr C had crab salad and Amanda had a burger. We all ate up and left very satisfied. A stroll around the harbour to look at some of the most amazing yachts I have ever seen and then we headed back to find Charlie. He had hardly spoken all day, just pointing out the things that we really needed to know, and that suited us as we had all been here before. I think we all had 40 winks on the way back, but the journey only took about 25 minutes.Charlie had been no trouble so he got himself a nice little tip.

We went to look for the bright coloured little shack on the board walk where I danced my dance last time we were here, but it had gone! Instead we ended up in a nice cool covered terrace of a bar in the courtyard, with just one cool drink for the road. I had to go into my tanzanite shop today to check out his rings. Oh wow, he does have the best rings I have ever seen in the Caribbean, but they are not for buying today, not by me anyway.

Back on the ship I look down longingly at Silver Shadow alongside us and im remembering just how fantastic Silversea cruises are. Yes I must get back on there one day soon.

Its 60′s & 70′s night tonight and the three C’s are dressing up. Amanda & Mick are John and Yoko Ono, Mr C is a typical 70′s disco maniac.

Darren didn’t recognise us when we met him for pre dinner drinks. Well, of course he recognised me because I was just me! They obviously stunned a few people as we walked into dinner. Why are we the only table?

Dinner service was spot on tonight, could not be faulted. Infact we had three waiters instead of two and the lads never put a foot wrong, you could see them checking and double checking every step of the way. Darren was hilarious. What a perfect wind swept and interesting host he is. Even he admitted to having jaw ache at the end of the meal, and we have never laughed so much. There is no question of a doubt that we were the very last to leave the restaurant tonight, but then Darren did have about 20 courses in between the talking lol.

60′s & 70′s party up by Laguna is in full swing and Inspiration are excellent. Its not long before we were all bobbing away and singing our heads off because of course that was our era. Mr C had to sit it out though because of his poorly foot. Im shattered, I cant take much more and I am the first to cave in a crawl to my bed.

Tuesday 17^th February 2009 ~ At Sea

Oh dear lots of work to do this morning. I cant complain, look at where I am. Im at sea on one of the best cruise ships ever built for the British passenger. Its February and yet its touching 30 degs outside. Ive had enough sun of late anyway so I get my head down and get on with some work. I get outside for 11.30 and the deck is pretty packed but im not stopping. A quick drink to wake me up and we have Gold Portunus lunch at noon in the Cinnamon Restaurant. I big kiss and a hug from Neil and a very sincere ‘Welcome Back for Captain Alistair Clarke and we are directed to our table.

Chris the 2^nd officer is our host and he is an excellent one. Dermot and Susie are to my right and I confess that I never got the chance to ask the names of the older couple sat to Mr C’s left. I wasn’t going to attend the lunch as it does get a bit monotonous (P&O take note, I know you read but do you take action?) I cant think for the life of me what is special about sitting in the restaurant eating a meal, which is always the same by the way, with fellow passengers. Considering they don’t do anything special for Gold passengers on a fly cruise they do get off very lightly and a bottle of wine in the cabin would be welcome, and I can tell you now that will cost you a lot less than what Me and Mr C (and a lot of my fellow Goldies) can drink in a Gold embarkation session at Southampton! So yes, Gold lunch was very pleasant, but it wasn’t the same without Justin. After lunch we went for a wander to try and find Amanda and Mick but we might as well have looked for a needle in a haystack, So I just decided to walk slowly and eventually she would spot me which of course she did.

We had managed to book a slot in the thermal suite for 3.00pm, just to see if the experience could have possibly got any better since last May? Was I hoping for too much. A very senior officer knew I was attending and has asked for my feedback, oh he is going to be sorry he did. The reception manager who booked us in made a very big deal of the fact that they only allow a maximum of 6 down there at any one time, well I was no.4 and Amanda was no.5 but it took him a while to work out if 5 was before or after 6? We were asked if we would like a robe? Eeeeer yes please, we have paid our money and would like to feel pampered. A robe each was dumped into our arms and that was it. Luckily for Amanda I had been here before so I was able to show her where the changing room was and the all important Thermal Suite was. Couldn’t expect the spa staff to go to any trouble on our behalf now could we? Well we were greeted at the top of the stairs to the thermal suite by 8 passengers with their feet in a bowl of mud! Mmmmm nice! Bet they felt ‘special’ to be given such a special location. We got in the thermal suite and the hot beds were full, the vapour room was full so we went straight into the steam room to get our eyeballs burnt out! Didn’t stop long in there so we managed to get into the vapour room, mmm cosy! Then oooh the excitement now we could go on the hot beds and relax. Relax in Ventura’s thermal suit? I don’t think so! By now I had counted 9 people in here, so what happened to the limit of 6? It really is just a joke down here. Next thing that happens is a therapist comes bursting through the door and yell ‘Mr Watson? Mr Watson? Then Mrs Watson pipes up ‘Bert’ at the top of her voice. Oh it was all too much for Amanda and she started to giggle which is never good as that just sets me off! It is like faulty towers experience in here and at least we are lucky that there is no aerobics session in progress. We decide its time to calm down and enter the dry quiet room, but my screeching yelp when I sat down and burnt my ass was just the icing on the cake. We had to make the dry room wet in the hope of cooling the seats enough to sit on them.

Back upstairs we got out of our robes and went to reception to collect our keys. The Spa manager was behind the desk and I was waiting for that magic ‘Did you enjoy that Lady’s? would you like to book again? But a P&O smile as she handed back or cruise cards was all she could muster. Oh well!

We found the lads in Ramblas having a beverage. I had one but then needed to get back to the cabin to see what work awaited me. I managed to crawl into bed for a snooze at 6.00pm thinking whats the point, 2 minutes later Darren called to arrange pre dinner drinks so I was up and in the shower. I got to wear my new ‘caribbean’ formal dress tonight and Mr C noticed so I was impressed.

Pre dinner drinks in Rambals tonight but we soon realised that was a mistake. We waited 20 minutes for our order only for the lad to come over and ask if I wanted a Martini cosmo or a shot? What? I just want a cosmo, where did they get the bartender from? The waiter knew what I wanted so went to report back, only to come back with some other excuse from the bartender so I had to have a southern comfort because it was obviously too much for them, plus the fact that Darren was about to pass out from dehydration! We decided to play it safe and order a repeat round when he got back with the first.

Restaurant manager was on the door waiting for my feedback on the waiters performance, and I marked them with an excellent. Hope they didn’t get in too much bother. Ooh did I tell you Rikki Hatton the boxer was sat in my seat last cruise? Well he was.

I wasn’t over inspired by tonight’s menu so I had the sirloin steak and fries. Oh yummy really enjoyable. The Raspberry and marshmallow Mess was a disappointment though so I had a replacement soufflé and grand marnier sauce. Darren’s quite by comparison to last night. But he is fab, we love Darren, entertaining, witty, charming, and lots of stories to tell.

Lots going on tonight, a show, a caberet. Mr & Mrs, disco, deck party, but we went for drinks in the Red Bar. I was not the slightest bit impressed when me and Amada sat on the sofa and realised to our disgust 10 minutes later that we had sat on a wet sofa. Oh no what if it wasn’t a spilt drink? I had to lift my dress and smell it and I didn’t give a hoot what the rest of the passengers thought! I think it was beer but what ever it was we were not impressed. That was a brand new dress. I didn’t have to say anything to Stan behind the bar. He had already been to see the night manager and was writing me out a note to prove that the incident took place in Red Bar. Im not best pleased. But what can I do?

Wednesday 18^th February 2009 ~ Grand Turk

Mr C is going diving this morning so there is no chance of a lay in for me. Despite me telling him to put his gear ready last night, of which he took not a blind bit of notice, he is up early and rushing around like there is some sort of fire. Oh chill, we’re in the Caribbean. Ive just picked up the phone and ordered me some breakfast, I know he hasn’t got the patience to wait for any, and the view from the balcony is picture postcard stuff. We’ve arrived at what looks like a white sandy beach, palm trees and a wooden board walk. So here I am, sat on my balcony, with a bowl of cornflakes and my pot of tea, looking out at this perfect Caribbean setting, thinking Wow.

I wonder how many people will get confused today? Grand Turk is one hour time difference but we are to stay on ships time. Oh well at least the bridge officer has just announced he will sounds the ships whistle 15 minutes before the gangway goes up.

I have just been ashore for a little wander round and I really love the place. Ok it’s a purpose built ‘Cruise Port’ but what an idyllic setting. White sandy beaches either side of the jetty, through a big duty free shop selling everything you could ask for and out into a shopping complex of purpose built gift shops and outlets. there is a pool complex with swim up bar, lots of music and everyone just seems to be soaking up the atmosphere. The shop keepers are friendly and don’t give you no hassle. Ive just bought my ‘holiday hat’ from a jolly lady sitting at her stall eating her breakfast and she was just so lovely. I believe she meant it when she said ‘have a nice day’

So what am I doing now? Well do you really want to know. Im sitting here on my balcony typing away think of all the poor souls stuck back in the UK on what im sure must be a pretty miserable Wednesday. Ive got an ice cold vodka and coke at my side and I am looking down at the most turquoise of seas that I have ever seen. Mr C must be having an amazing time out scuba diving, and I know he is going to come back and tell me all about what he must surely have seen in this crystal clear sea. I will report back on that later.

I don’t know why people whinge and whine about the balcony furniture on here? Ok the chairs are upright but so what? They are pretty dam comfy and maybe some people just need to learn to chill a bit and accept things the way they are. I have to ask myself ‘do I really want to have a reclining chair and lie there looking at a boring bulkhead and sprinkler valve system?’ No, I don’t, I want to look out to sea, down on the dockside to see who’s coming and going and across to the beach to see if I can see anyone I recognise.

Oh I must get back to my vodka and coke ….catch up with you all later.

Mr C arrived back from his dive very excited at what he had seen. Puffa fish and all sorts of things and a turtle swam right upto him, trouble was he had ran out of underwater film to take the turtles photo so he was a bit disappointed.

We wandered off ashore again to meet Amanda and Mick and Karen & John for a drink. What a lively little purpose built resort this is.

We had to sample the cocktail menu and I have a frozen margeritta, a hurricane and an incuminacado. We also decided to have some nice picky food in the form of nacho’s and honey barbeque wings, oh yum. I really like this little tiny bit of Grand Turk. Everything was there really, shops, pool, bar, music, flow rider, beaches,crystal blue sea, ship at the end of the pier. I do wonder what the rest of Grand Turk was like but I didn’t hear anyone say that they had been or seen anything other than the cruise centre. 20 minutes before departure the Captain sounded the ships horn as promised to say come back home and we were one of the last back onboard. Mainly because I sent Mr C back to take photos of the empty board walk.

Up to Breakers Bar for the sailaway party.Neil and his team must do the best sailaway parties, the amount of effort that they put into it is fantastic. I think its fair to say that everyone out on deck had a fantastic time and we all shouted for more, and got it, when the party ended.

For the first time in ages I had time to have a proper sleep before the evening commenced but oh boy was it hard work waking up. Im sure I could have stayed there for ever. We made it to Metropolis for pre dinner drinks and it’s a good job too because it was Las Vegas night. Cant remember what the cocktail of Las Vegas was but it was rather nice.

Darren was a little more hungry than usual tonight so had no less than four starters where does he put it? He keeps us well entertained though. Everyone was flagging a little tonight but I managed to convince them we should have one for the road in Red Bar

Thursday 19^th February 2009 ~ Catalina Island

We are up early as usual and decide to have a nice leisurely breakfast in the restaurant and be waited on. What a lovely way to start the day. People were already queuing for the tender tickets and we managed to get tender number 4 so once the boats were in the water we didn’t have much of a wait. We were some of the first ashore and it was defiantly the best way to see the island before it filled up.

Lovely clear blue sea again but it has jelly fish and already a few have been stung so I don’t venture past my ankles. Mr C did see a few when he was swimming but avoided their sting. Boat loads of people just never stopped coming all day, I didn’t know what 3000 people looked like but I do now! In all honesty it was too many people in one place for me, but it was a one off so I was happy to sit and people watch. The set up was excellent and obviously well practiced. The bar was set up in the middle and at the far end. The barbeque was under a large housing at the near end.

There was music and dancing blasting across the beach. The shop keepers and stall holders were a pain in the ass and couldn’t leave you to just browse which really bugs me. We spent the morning pretty much just sunbathing, paddling or snorkelling for Mr C and wandering around. The queue for lunch soon built up but to be fair it moved very fast. We decided to have lunch and make a move, both before I frazzled and before the boat queue got out of control.

Catalina Island is a fantastic stop but having done it once I have no desire to do it again. If I had disembarked the ship any later than we had done I probably would have turned around and gone back to the ship. If ever I am out this way again I would choose to stay onboard and enjoy the peace and tranquillity. It was a beautiful beach but not with that amount of people on it.

Once we are back onboard I am straight in the shower and crawl into bed for the best sleep ever! It was hard work lying in the sun and strolling around on the soft white sand.

Pre dinner drinks in the Red Bar with a nice Kir Royal and my Wind Swept and interesting officer.

Only Amanda and Mick and ourselves and Darren for diner this evening as the others are dining in East. Despite us advising the waiters that only 5 of us would be in for dinner he still laid the table for 9 and crammed us all down one end of the table. Mr C is flagging despite his big sleep this afternoon and he has to take to his bed (don’t let anyone tell you that cruising is relaxing!) me and Amanda and Mick check out the entertainment in Havana but im not into game shows at sea, so we moved onto Tamarind. There was a singer called Siobhan Phillips who people had said were good but she didn’t manage to capture us and so we drifted off elsewhere. We decided on the tranquiilty and coolness of Ramblas Tree and there we sat people watching and chatting and of course enjoying a drink.

Friday 20^th February 2009 ~ at sea

Im up on deck and on my sunlounger for 7.00am this morning. I might have said this before but it’s the best time of the day to be up on deck (pity the bars not open though) the night shift of deck hands are still about and doing their cleaning. Im sure they think I am the crazy lady of the ship, but they all greet me with a cheery good morning. The deck fills up over the next couple of hours and I spend the morning going back and forth to my laptop to do some work. Cocktail of the day is a Hurricane! I really have to concentrate on my bookings after 3 of those! The lads take to the shade, they say its for the benefit of Karen as she cant sit in the sun, but I don’t now what their excuse to carry on drinking is when Karen goes for her spa treatment. Funnily enough they are still there when she returns two hours later! For the fist time ever, I have seen the deck supervisor come up onto top deck and order the pool attendant to get every blue towel of the unoccupied chair. Fair play to the man. I could tell that the pool attendant was hesitant so the deck supervisor started pulling the towels off and passing them to the pool lad. Whish I could hang around for the fireworks but we have decided on a Ramblas lunch again today so I miss the people coming back to their chairs, shame I bet it was fun, but then they shouldn’t reserve sun loungers!

Menu has changed in Ramblas and today I had chicken in figs and ham. Very nice but not as nice as the orange chicken. We decide to have a coffee and hot chocolate in the Atrium. They have had a big crew change this cruise and the order of hot chocolate with marshmallows was a bit much for this lad but we got him there in the end.

Time for bed! Big sleep and oh thank goodness for the windswept and interesting one! If he didn’t give us a wakeup call every day when he finishes work I think we might sleep through dinner some nights.

Portunus Cocktail party in the Tamarind Club tonight. Well, I did think it strange that the invites said the Tamarind Club but hey what do I know? They have two people doing Justins job now so surely they know what they are doing? Oh what a surprise when we are directed to Havana instead of Tamarind! Im not a big lover of Havana as a room, its far to divided up for my liking.

We are served well with the drinks but the two trays of nibbles managed to avoid us. We didn’t win the goblets (come on P&O its about time you got a new gift sorted out, and please please don’t tell me that our Portunus gift is yet another ‘Ventura mug’ that would make 6 Ventura and 3 Aurora mugs we will have collected since last April. I’ll keep you posted on that one.

Its Gala dinner tonight but I don’t like lobster so I had the lamb. I enjoyed the starter of melon ribbons with ginger and the tomato soup with vodka the best. Darren was his usual windswept and interesting self but he got a million brownie points when he went and told the engine control room to whack up the air con. We were all melting in our seats up until that point.

Me and Mr C went for a very warm and romantic stroll out on prom deck after dinner and that was the first time I had set foot out there this cruise. it was quite breezy though and the front part of the deck was closed off due to high wind I guess. We had one for the road in Red Bar and then headed for bed. I couldn’t resist a look in the theatre as Chronicles was on. The usual acrobatic man and  lady weren’t on but they had two blokes in their place. OMG, I thought the others were good but these were amazing! I stood in ore and watched them for a while, it was quite rocky tonight but they only stumbled once, and when one bloke did a one handed handstand on the other blokes head it lft the audience gasping. Mr C had gone on ahead of me so was already under the duvet when I arrived at the cabin. I always go out onto the balcony when I get in, just to look at the stars and take in some air, but a always close the door behind me and let the air conditioning keep us cool.

Saturday 21^st February 2009 ~ My Birthday ~ St Kitts or not St Kitts?

Woke up to a beautiful sunrise with the hills of St Kitts as the back drop. Mr C had ordered champagne breakfast for me as it is my birthday and it was all set up on the balcony in the sunshine.

Perfect! I opened my cards sipping champagne and basking in the early morning sun. Captain tried to spoil the day by announcing we couldn’t get into St Kitts due to a bit of a strong cross wind but nothing is going to spoil my day. Ive been to St Kitts so it doesn’t really matter to me and Im all for a day at sea, but I dare say that there are some who might be a bit cheesed off. Anyway we are ‘hovering’ for a short while to see if we can get in later this morning.

I have just had Happy Birthday sang to me live from the engine room! They have some very wind swept and interesting people down there. I thought that was rather  nice and has made my day. Ive also just had delivered a lovely vase of yellow roses and then a helium filled tropical fish and Card arrived. The sun is beating onto the balcony down and I see we have started to break waves through the sea so it looks like he has made the decision not to stay at St Kitts today and we are on our way? Never mind, technically I did eat my breakfast in St Kitts and I feel as if I have been there even if I haven’t.

The deck was packed up by Breakers Bar despite the blustery wind, but I wasn’t in the mood for lounging around today. I was a little surprised when the Captain, Cruise Director and Exec Purser came out on deck, they must have know it was my birthday and I got a big kiss and a hug from Neil and a very formal greeting from the Captain. We had a couple of drinks in the sunshine and then went on a bit of a shopping spree. Met John Flowers buying his pirate accessories for tonights pirate party and he reminded me on an excited child who had just been to the market on a Saturday morning with his grannie and came away with a little treat, lol. Mr C has spotted another diving trip he fancies doing in St Maarten, diving with sharks, but Matt has advised that there isn’t enough takers for that one so he is going on another two tank dive there instead.

We had to make a decision between lunch in the main restaurant and lunch on deck in the sunshine. We chose chicken burgers from Frankies Grill on deck but chose to sit out of the sun. the steel band were playing and we all swayed to the tunes as we ate. We followed lunch with some Ice Cream sundaes from the other part of Frankie’s, we were supposed to be sharing with the lads but we didn’t do a lot of sharing!

After another little stroll around we decided on drinks in Metropolis. Me & Amanda nipped into the ladies and just as I was coming out I was thrown into another cublices door way. We knew were listing as we were practically in the wash hand basins washing our hands. Out in Metropolis the lads and the waiters were staring in disbelief at the sea, apparently it looked like we had been surfing. It later transpires that 60 knot gust of wind hit us side ways on like a bolt out of the blue and sent us listing to one side. Well it gave us something to talk about for the afternoon. Not content with just having lunch we decided we needed some nibbles with our Shanghai’s. now it must have took the waiter a good 10 minutes to give us his spiel about why we cant have any crisps or nuts in Metropolis, despite them being on the menu. In short he reckons that they don’t sell nibbles because nobody asks for them. Maybe because they ask once and never ask again? This whole ‘going the extra mile’ gold pin business is a load of twaddle because the room was empty, the barman, who has been around for years and I can never ever remember him greeting me or even smiling, was listening and he couldn’t be bothered to send out for some. If there is one barman who needs a boot up his deirier its him. Justin our waiter was very entertaining if nothing else. He bought John Flowers over his Bacardi and coke, Bacardi in one glass and coke in the other. When John questioned why he was told he needed to take a swig from one, a swig from the other and then stand up and wiggle to mix them up. He was very graphic and had us in fits of giggles. The entertainment was great but the sullen look from the barman was killing me so we had to depart. Time for bed and a big sleep.

My windswept and interesting personal wakeup call came in just after 6 this evening, what would I do without him? I must make the effort to be awake and actually chat to him one night. I get ready at a nice leisurely pace but Mr C is in a right old flap about his pirate costume. His parrot wont sit on his shoulder properly so there I am sewing the dam thing to his shirt for him!

We meet in Metroplois and oh don’t the boys and Auntie Amanda look fab! There is a lot ‘jim lad, oooarrrrrh’ tonight, its not going to be a quiet table that’s for sure.

Now then I had asked for a lot of balloons in the restaurant tonight, and wow had they done a good job. There were balloons on every window. I had two big bunches of balloons over the table and the girls had been busy with the table decorations.

We had a lovely meal with much chatter and laughter as usual, but then came the big finale. The boys had been told that I wanted the biggest choir and oh boy did I get it. The cake was presented to me and it took me a while to focus without my glasses on. What did it say? ‘Happy Birthday Giraffe’?? oh now I remember. Knowing just how difficult the reception desk can make it to order a cake (its not rocket science they just make it sound like rocket science at the time) so I had set the girls a challenge back on QM2 to get me a giraffe on the cake. So Karen and Amanda had been to reception to make this request and Karen thought it went very easily. She said she had requested ‘Happy Birthday Jane’ and then she sketched a picture of a giraffe for them to ice on there too. Easy? Wrong! What the pastry chef must have been thinking when he got the order for that one I do not know, or how it got lost in translation is beyond me. Well it made us howl with laughter. The section waiter hadn’t got a clue what was going on and when he read the accompanying gift card which read, ‘Happy Birthday Giraffe from Flower’ he thought it was some sort of code and was left scratching his head.

The waiters very carefully cut up the cake and gave me the section which said Giraffe. We all giggled as we ate. The Pirate deck party never really got going thanks to a bit of drizzly rain, so we made our own fun by conducting a real life Pirate Wedding

Then it was onto Red bar for a cosmopolitan, luckily Stan was still there as I can only get a Cosmo when he is on duty. We fancied a bit of a boogie but Havana was dead, and there was very little else on, so it was Metropolis time! We really did have a moving real life video wall this evening as we approached St Lucia and berthed for the evening. I had had a big day, what ith giraffe birthday cakes and all that, so it was time for me to go and find my duvet. I did pop my head into the back of the Areana theatre on the way and caught the very end of Neil Diamond tribute. Mmmmm…..? no comment. We were ‘starboard side too’ again, lol so I could go out on the balcony and see all the crew very excitedly going ashore for a night on the town, and they deserve it too. I bet its not very often that they get nights ashore especially during the Caribbean season. There were one or two passengers milling around on the dockside but I think that was more to look at the ship all lit up. I cant say that I fancied going ashore here. If we had been berthed over on the duty free side we might have ventured into the karaoke bar but this side of the port scares me in daytime so no way I was trotting ashore after dark. Im easily scared in the dark by the way.

Portunus gifts had arrived. Oh no not anther dam mug! That’s 8 we collected in less than 12 months. Come on Portunus get your act together and try to realise that some ‘loyal’ passengers do cruise more than once a year!

Sunday 22^nd February 2009 ~ St Lucia

The days started pretty much the same as usual. A bit of work at the desk. Breakfast on the balcony, just a different back drop today. We have decided that we want to go to Pigeon Island today. Mr C has been in charge of guide books and daily events and that is what he has come up with. So off we go to find a taxi. Oh why do all the taxi men go on and on and on so early in the morning. Think I need to ask the ‘windswept and interesting’ one for some ear defenders. Maps in your face, you wanna go to the beach? One after the other and you dare to talk to one and they all talk together. Have you guessed yet that Im not a morning person and being sociable isn’t an art I have mastered when Im tired and maybe have a little bit of a hangover? Anyway, we are almost out of duty free and one picks up on where we want to go and his price is 4 times less than the first bloke so we wait with some others while he finds enough to fill his mini bus and we are on our way. All of the others are going to the beach that he wants to take them too at Spinakers, but we have been there before. Its nice enough and Spinakers restaurant is in a nice little spot, but it’s the beach where everyone goes, and again its far too commercial for me, but taxi man is determined to try and convince us to go there. He tells us the sea is rough at Pigeon point and its $5 to get into the reserve etc etc, but no thank you we want Pigeon Point. He did agree to take us and he agreed to collect us at 3 which was good, although he was collecting the others at 2.30 which was only 10 – 15 minutes down the road so it seemed a bit generous to me, but hey.

Pigeon Point was lovely and I can highly recommend it. It had the rough Atlantic on one side and the calm Caribbean on the other. You do pay $5 to enter the reserve and also pay for sunloungers at the entrance. It was gorgeous. We walked along the Atlantic side up over the lawns, past a pub in a bit of a cave and through the gardens over to the other side, and what a sight before me. Royal Clipper was just coming into the bay to anchor.

Oh she is lovely. We found a little beach with nobody on, collected a lounger and that was my base for the day. Yes this will do nicely. There is a little shack type restaurant just along the path so I have everything I need. Mr C went snorkelling but he had to fetch me a rum punch first. I lay there looking at Royal Clipper and all the lovely little boats, and watched the people come and go on their dingy’s from their yachts to shore and back. Mr C took a hike upto the top of Pigeon Point but that was far too strenuous for me today, maybe next time?  I occasionally went into the calm blue sea upto my neck to cool down but that was as much as I did today.

For lunch we packed up and made or way along to the little shack at the edge of the water. It was a lovely setting and we ordered lunch. Wasn’t long before I was clock watching, and I forgot that everything in the Caribbean is in Caribbean time. Lunch did eventually arrive but I felt as if I rushed it as we need to be back at the entrance for our ride home. It was a very brisk walk back to find the taxi but Mr C was just telling me not to panic because he could see the white mini bus, but it drove off and we were dead ontime too! I knew he had left too bigger gap between pickups and he must have just wanted his next fare. I was slightly worried about how we would get back but there were too taxi men there, probably not official ones but they offered to take us back and it was half the price so we weren’t complaining. He had to drop us well away from the other taxi drivers too or he might have got lynched, but I was relieved to be back.

Oh bliss, the air conditioning of Ventura.

Big night out in East tonight for me and Mr C, Amanda and Mick and the windswept and very interesting Darren. I had booked the table that I had said I wanted last May for my birthday meal, and today was the 3^rd day of my Birthday celebrations so it was where I said I was going to be just a day later. I wanted the table with arm chairs and I got it.

But first we had pre dinner drinks and Tapas at the bar. Has to be done, purely for research purposes of course and I can highly recommend them. Kir Royal was very nice too! So to or table and let the feast commence and what a feast we had, starting with the chefs complimentary, then a starter, the chicken soup is to die for, then the tenderest of beef and a pud to finish all off. I wanted a Rubis to really finish it off but guess what, despite Rubis being offered on the menu as the speciality after drinner recommended liquer, they ‘don’t serve in this bar’ Mmm….. no point dwelling on it. Oh how we sat and giggled at the table after dinner. I never knew that Darren could giggle like a girl but he can, and I think the entire deck knows that he can too now. The more he giggled the more we giggled. Oh and all the times I trecked out to the loo when there was one in there all the time just opposite the wedding booths where we sat last time. I never knew that! Eventually we decided to roll into Red Bar, but the ship was getting ready to go to bed. Its been a fun fun night.

Monday 23^rd February 2009 ~ St Maarten

A busy day on the quay side today, with Seranade of the seas across from us. HAL Maasdam infront  of us and one of those pretend sailing ships across from that. Mr C had another two tank dive booked so I wandered off the ship nice and early before the crowds of other passengers were awake and stolled upto the duty free area. I looked at some of the jewellery but looking was all I could afford. Decided to take the water taxi across to Phillipsburg and managed that quite easily without any queuing etc. it was $4 one way or $6 for an all day pass. Philipsburg was dressed and waiting for its visitors. This was the best part of the day to see the place.

The promenade was empty and all the chairs and parasols were lined up in uniform waiting for the sunbathers. I strolled all along the front to the other water taxi station and then went down and along the parallel shopping street.I was in full blown shop browsing mode when I found out that Mr C’s dive had been cancelled due to a problem with the dive boat so he was very disappointed. We eventually met up, (mobile signal is rubbish here) and went for a fresh fruit smoothie at Daphne’s, well ok I admit I had mine laced with rum, but they are so nice as she used only fresh fruit. We sat on the beach under the palm trees and it seemed rude not to have another one, and they were very cooling.

We wandered back upto the shopping street and just strolled along. Mr C got an absolute bargain of a dive watch. He managed to get the all singing, all dancing Citizen dive watch for less than half the price that it is in the ship shop. I was happy to just sit on a stool in the jewellers while he looked at it and soak up the cool air conditioning. For once I hardly said a word and Mr C isn’t that good at bartering, but there was no need. The shopkeeper never shut up, and he managed the unique art f bartering with himself. It is very very hot outside and there has been a few times when I have just felt like melting today. It was quite funny watching the shop keeper barter with himself though. Basically he could tell that Mr C was very keen to purchase but John hardly said a thing apart from when he was asking technical questions. The bloke in the shop just kept bartering with himself and shaved more and more off the price. He wrapped the thing up and started on the receipt which just set me off laughing. As we turned to leave empty handed he shook Mr C’s hand and the bargain price was agreed. Mr C is highly delighted and apparently the watch is so clever it tells the time too!

We had decided to go to The Greenhouse for lunch as recommended by the ‘Windswept and Interesting one’, but it was at the other end of town. I thought I was going to pass out getting there. I don’t know what the temperature is today, I like the sun normally but this was killing me. We arrived at the Greenhouse only to find Amanda and Mick and Karen & John already there. Oh give me a strawberry daquari, just to cool me down you understand. I had the jerk chicken wrap for lunch but there was far too much so Mr C had to eat the second half.

From here we moved back outside to Daphane’s and sat back in the coolness of the shade under the palm trees with the sea lapping on the shore behind us. I did have one very scarey moment when a ‘dinosaur’ came out of a tree and ran under my chair. I screamed and swore, it was the shock, but he was a massive lizard thing. And yes I do mean massive, it wasn’t one of those little geckho things.  Another frozen daquarri soon numbed the pain. The bar next door had two karaoke singers and althougt they didn’t look it they were fab. So we sat and soaked it all up, sometimes we danced in the sea but it was a fantastic day and we all had a superb time.

Sadly we had to get back to Ventura before she sailed and were on one of the last water taxi’s out of town back to the ships. I was straight into the shower to cool down and I could here the deck party blasting out across the top deck but I was happy to sit on the balcony watching the Seranade of the Sea passengers dancing to our sailaway music. There were some very latecomers to the other ship and the whole of Ventura and Seranade were hanging over the side of the ship clapping and cheering them onboard. I don’t think security were quite so impressed as they literally rolled the gangway up behind them. They were the first to depart and there was much blasting of horns and waving and cheering. She actually looked quite nice as she sailed off into the sunset.

Senior officers Private party up by Breakers Bar this evening. I thought it was going to be windy up there but I think Captain Clarke had slowed us down to just a few knots as there was just a very gentle breeze to keep us cool. The drinks always flow more freely at this function than any other on the ship, but I knew I had had enough and so just the one was more than enough for me. You also get the best canapés too and the spring rolls were delicious. Captain Clarke came over for a nice long chat and we talked about the progress of Ventura and the new Azura which always interests me.

I admit I don’t agree with him re the dropping of semi formal dress code on Ventura and Oceana but he assures me it wont happen on the other ships.

We were very very late for dinner tonight. Even later than the table that is always late. We did apologise and then blamed Darren, lol. I thought the menu was the worst ever tonight and I really struggled. I had the ‘always available’ prawn cocktail, then the chicken broth but then I was beat. Lamb was on there yet again! Where the heck do they get all these lambs from? I dared to ask if I might be able to have a jacket potato and yippee I can. Then I slipped in a request for some baked beans and yummy jacket potato with baked beans was born. I was happy with that. The sun and the drinks have drained most of us today and Mr C is falling asleep at the table so we head to our bed. I could have stayed out but I really don’t have the energy and anyway Im on holiday

Tuesday 24^th February 2009 ~ Tortola

After our early night we are both awake and on the balcony for 7.15am watching our arrival into Tortola. Its another perfect morning and HAL Maasdam is already along side. We go Starboard side too again opposite her and she looks so small, and the passengers look no fun at all.

Mr C has no diving booked for today and we are off quite early. We have been here many times but I have yet to visit Pussers Landing so that is where I would like to go. We ask at the taxi’s at the end of the Pier but the taxi drivers don’t seem to want to take us and tell us there is nothing there, and their prices are way over the top. We decide to walk beyond the port gate and run the gauntlet past another set of taxi drivers which are even more expensive than the ones inside. We got all the way to the end of the road by the little gift shops on the left and agree a price with Patrick the taxi driver. He explains why it is so expensive and shows us on the map where it is that we want to go to. Even he says I’m not going to need an hour at Pussers Landing, I think he is thinking ‘Mad tourists’ the drive along the coast was worth every penny. We drove right along the edge of the sea, and he pointed out what we needed to see like Jose Van Dyke and St Thomas etc. it was early when we arrived at Pussers Landing so we probably got to see it at its best. It was very very pretty, and the yachts in the marina were amazing. Pussers Bar wasn’t open, but when she realised that I wanted two Painkillers she soon opened up!

The rest of the P&O passengers that were on a tour seemed to be drinking coffee, lol. I could have quite happily sat there for a couple of hours just soaking up  the wonderful view. Back in the taxi we discussed whether to go to Smugglers Cove or Brewers Bay beach and in the end Patrick suggested Mr C would have better snorkelling at Brewers Bay. Again the drive was amazing, first going up and over a hill and approaching Cane Garden Bay from the left, and then driving along the back of Cane Garden and over another steep hill to Brewers Bay. The views of the aqua clear blue see were simply amazing.

The beach was perfect for me. A stunning bay, a little smaller than Cane Garden but far less commercialised so for me it was a lot nicer. I hate commercial beaches rammed full of rows of deckchairs and parasols. Brewers Bay is almost empty, there is one bar at the end near the road and as you walk along the chairs and people get even less. We walked around until I had a little spot up near the trees but still right on the water edge with nobody else around me. Mr C trecked back to get me a lounger and I was set up for the morning. He said the snorkelling down by the rocks was some of the best he has done and he saw the biggest fish he has ever seen while snorkelling. It was an idyllic Caribbean beech just like I imagine a Caribbean beach to be. We had arranged for Patrick to collect us at 1230 (I know that sounds early but remember we always start our day early) it was only a 20 minute ride back over the hill and he dropped us right outside Pussers Bar. It was really busy inside and the waiting staff were as surly as ever. I stood and talked to Amanda & Mick while Mr C went to the bar and they immediately put our drinks on their tab. We later found out that if you are ‘with’ someone its one bill for all, so moral of the story is don’t talk to anyone in there lol. It was an effort to get them to allow us to pay for our own food, just because we sat on a table with them by this time, and when the Flowers and the Robinsons turned up I thought the waitress was going to have a right fit! Food was worth the effort and we had spicey Pussers wings, spare ribs, potato skins and nacho’s. Mr C always goes over the top when ordering.

was so busy in there that we only had one further drink and then we left. I cannot describe to you how hot it is outside but I was melting a few yards down the street. We walked across to the little marina as I had never been before and decided that the bar there was worthy of a visit next time and they also looked to be serving nice food. Back out on the main street I was into the first modern shop just to benefit from the air conditioning, and half way down the street I was across the road into the jewellers again to feel the benefit of the air con. Mr C saw his dive watch in there 3 times the price of what he paid in St Maarten I browsed the jewellery and thankfully not one assistant tried to assist me which was good as we had only gone in to cool down, lol, perhaps they knew.

Back onboard I just passed out on the bed and stayed there until gone 4 when I managed to prise myself off the bed and get into a cool shower. Great British Sailaway up on deck so I couldn’t miss that. I know I have said this before but Neil and the team undoubtedly do the best sailaway party’s ever and I have never seen one under attended party this cruise. He had the whole ship waving their flags and dancing the decks. An unforgettable sight.

Mr C bought a beer back and we sat quietly on the balcony as we slipped away from Tortola past all the lovely little island dotted along the way.

We are dining in East again this evening but not until 9.00pm so we have time for later pre dinner drinks at 8 in the East Bar including Tapas for the hungry lads. It was the same menu tonight as the night before last and tonight I chose the new special with was more or less tikka meats, naan and dips, very nice. I had pre warned the waitress that I ‘was’ having a Rubis wine tonight and she must have sneaked out to get me one at one point because it was served to me only at the end of the meal, not something I would go mad to try again. It tasted more like a special Christmas liqueur chocolate.

It was very very late when we left East, so late that I thought the rest of the ship was in bed, but there were still people n Red Bar and Tamarind was just closing. We had a couple of drinks in Red Bar but we are all beat yet again and crawl off to bed. On the balcony I can hear the deck party in full swing again. There seems to have been music of some description up by Laguna or Breakers most nights, shame we never have the energy to get there.

Wednesday 25^th February 2009 ~ Dominica

My eyes must be trained now to open at 7.15 every morning. We are just approaching Dominica. In the past we have always docked out of town around the corner with HAL taking the prime town spot, but today it is ours. RCI is in the dock around the other side where we usually are. So today I have shops at the end of a walkway. Dominica isn’t one of the best places in the Caribbean, but our blue and yellow bar is a stones throw away so I’m sure I will be in there for a drink at some point during the day. Mr C is diving here this afternoon in place of his cancelled St Maarten dive. He has dived here every time we have been here so would have liked to try somewhere else, but at least he knows its good diving here.

We decided to go ashore for a bit of a wander this morning. Not one of my favourite ports but handy as its just at the end of the pier. We are starboard side too again which always makes me smile. We wandered from one end of the main street to the other looking at all the tat stalls to see what they had to offer, then as predicted we ended up in CocoRico the blue and yellow bar for a drink. I love the rum punch here so felt obliged to have one but it nearly blew my head off. It wasn’t exactly lunch time but I fancied one of the tasty looking baguettes being served so I had a delicious tuna mayo baguette washed down with a strawberry daiquiri. Mick and Amanda came along just intime for the second drink. We had a stroll upto the dive shop to get Mr C his 3^rd underwater camera (the pics had better be good after this) then Mick had a bar he wanted to take us to called The Ruins! Well me being all sweet and innocent I didn’t know quite what to make of this place. For a start off there was ghekko’s scurrying all over the walls which totally freaked me out and they had rather a large display of ‘herb’s & spices’ for sale, some of the herbs had very interesting claims. Mr C got told ff for taking a picture in there so something dodgy was going on. I was paranoid what was in my ‘special’ rum punch but it looked good served in a bamboo cane with a coconut shell lid.

Amanda and Mick were on Champagne reef snorkel trip this afternoon and Mr C was going on his dive so I had the afternoon to myself. Now it would have been nice to just chill out and relax but it wasn’t that easy. I had work to do and worse still I had the packing to start on. I just cant get my head around the logistics of where you can pack what, plus I have to leave out St Vincent stuff, Thursday night stuff, Friday daytime stuff and travelling home stuff, of my head spins with it all. I decide to get myself on deck, find a quiet spot and relax. I ended up in a chair overlooking the endless pool and it was nice and quiet away from the maddening crowd but oh heck it was hot. This cruise really has been very very hot. I had a stroll upto deck 19 where the trampolines are and I thought I would melt on the spot. How people were sunbathing up there I do not know. The trampolines and the two circus rings are the only evidence of Cirque Ventura now. The trapeze has gone and the space is filled with sunbeds. The trampolines are all caged off so its not a welcoming sight up there, but at least its quiet if that’s what you want.

I ended up back at the cabin packing another case, but because of things in boxes that have been collected during the cruise, like those dam Ventura Portunus mugs I don’t have enough space so I ended up buying a holdall from the shop to hold all the extras.

I spotted Mr C’s dive boat come back in so we waved. One of the tours was very late and were rushed back up the pier before we could sail. I tried to sleep but it never really happened plus it was getting late and I had no sooner laid down than my windswept and interesting officer was on the phone to make sure we were awake.Formal night tonight and pre dinner drinks in Red Bar. It was busy pre dinner and its more like Captains Welcome Aboard  lots of people standing.

Gala Dinner is the usual Beef Welington and a trio of chocolate puds that turned out to be four. Im so tired, I really want my bed but I cant, it’s almost the last night.

Late night disco in Metropolis and you might be pleased to note that children are not allowed. Oh and big news of the cruise, the bartender that was behind the bar, one i have seen for years, actually cracked a smile tonight, much to Mr C’s amusement. I wish I had the energy to have a really late night but the sun and the heat have drained me so it’s the very long treck back to the forward end to find my bed.

Thursday 26^th February 2009 ~ St Vincent

We are awake early again to watch our arrival into St Vincent, our last port of call before Barbados, which is sad. There is a little liquid sunshine around and a rainbow going into the sea, but the Deputy Captain advises us that its going to be the hottest day of the cruise today so that’s going to zapp me. And Aida Arura has just pulled alongside spoiling a little of the lovely view. But it was a lovely penultimate breakfast on the balcony.

Having never visited St Vincent before me and Mr C decide to go on a reckie and see what there is to see ashore. Well if I thought Dominica town was a dive this place is beyond words. Its certainly got ‘character’ I will give it that. We walked for quite a way in the hope that once we got out of the port area it would get better but it didn’t. The ferry terminal made it very busy both on foot and on the road. We had to turn back because it was just too hot and the sun was beating down, put that together with how busy the streets were and my head was spinning. There were plenty of taxi drivers at the port gate and we asked where there is to go and  Rodney the taxi man suggested Palms Beach, but be sure to ask for Rodney when we are ready to go to the beach.

Oh the tranquillity of Ventura! I was straight to the cabin for a full change of clothes, I was wet through it was so hot.

10.30 rendevouz with Flowers and Crossland under the tree in Ramblas with a nice mocha coffee to discuss where we can go and after checking through the guide books we decide Palms Beach it has to be. There was a Pirate water taxi to Palms beach but im unsure of the cost. We later heard some woman complaining because she got wet on the water taxi! Oh you have to laugh.

True to my word we did tell the taxi drivers we wanted Rodney, but Bugsy Malone came in half way through a conversation and wanted to take us to Palms Beach for $10pp return, so we piled into his min cab, but where had he gone? He was outside yelling for Rodney. Lol, he thought Rodney was one of our friends we had lost and hadn’t got a clue he was a fellow cab driver. The drive to the beach was hair raising to say the least and was much further than I thought especially for only $10 return. Now I had told Bugsy that we didn’t want a beach that was rammed with passengers, but he said that this one was the best, with facilities etc. we turned off the main road and into a steep picturesque drive way. Bugsy walked us through the most beautiful flower lined garden and out onto a terrace with pool and down to the beach all beautiful! OMG, the beach was rammed with Aida and P&O passengers, I knew it. We walked along the beach to try and find enough floor space for 6 but failed so headed back upto the pool terrace where we sat under a lovely pergola in the shade from the burning sun. it was hot, very very hot, just like the Captain said it would be hot, but a sunlounger in the sun was calling me.

First I had to completely cover the sun bed in towels to stop the mattress burning me. It was sheer frazzling weather today and It was hard work to try and sit in it. I had to sip ice cold cola, rum punches, dip in and out of the pool and sometimes even treck to the sea and back, but you had to be quick because the volcanic sand fried your feet. Oh boy was it hot! A heat I wont forget in a long time.

We decided to have lunch and luckily someone decided to order it well before we were over hungry. In true Caribbean fashion it took forever to arrive but it was worth the wait. Two freshly cooked Pizza, a selection of sandwiches and a few bowls of fries. There was so much. Good job Bugsy Malone was around to help us eat it all. We knew we were late but hey it’s de Caribbean and Bugsy instructed us to chill and take our time so we did. Another hair raising trip back to the ship with a lot of horn blasting between fellow road users. Despite the actual port area and town being the pitts, the roads were some of the best maintained that we had seen in the Caribbean and the places we drove through were very nice.  The gift shops in the terminal building are nothing really to write home about and sell some random stuff. I managed to get a fridge magnet to add to my collection so I was happy. As we walked back along the dockside to the ship Mr Flowers decided to start swinging his pants! I have no idea why? Maybe he feels liberated?

Drink, we need a drink! So we are straight through into the Exchange to flop out on the cool leather sofas. This bar is so much nicer and user friendly now that the smokers have been banned. We all just flake out on the sofa with rum punch or a beer to cool us down. Its CSQ form filling time so I use the opportunity to complete that ready for the draw.

As if we haven’t had enough food for one day, or even for a cruise we decide to do afternoon tea, just because we haven’t had time to do it any other day. You wouldn’t think that afternoon tea could be anything to laugh about but it was like a comedy sketch from the moment we stepped upto the table. All of a sudden we were descended on by 4 or 5 waiters, one with scones, one with toasted teacakes, one with warm crumpets, one pouring the tea and all this before the napkin had hit our laps! Oh how we giggled. Mr Crossland was a latecomer to the table and got himself all flumuxed amongst the laughter and asked the waiter for ‘uno Crumpo’ now the waiter was in fits of giggles, and told all the other waiters around that we were a bunch of nutters! Which of course we are.

I have put this off for far too long but I have to go and face the final bit of packing, which is always the worst bit of packing as I have to find space somewhere for everything. Mr C was a tired boy so decided that the floor of the cabin was the best place for a ‘deckhead survey’ and he was passed out before I had time to get anything into the cases.

Its all such a rush. I need a shower and want to attend the last sailaway party so decide shower and then deck party is the best order of the day as I can dry hair while drinking in sunshine!

I have to say, if I haven’t said it already that Neil and the team do the best deck party’s (lol, I think I have said that lots of times). I have never ever seen the deck parties attended like I have seen them this cruise and he gets the whole of the top decks singing and dancing and waving their arms. Im not a lover of the Ventura signature tune and there are other songs that will remind me of the deck parties. This deck party certainly was a memorable one and we blasted horns both to St Vincent, to Aida and to the incoming Ocean Village.

There is no getting away from it, I must go and stress over the last of the packing. And stress I do. So I decide to do what I can and get ready for an evening on the ‘ship of dreams’

Our last pre dinner drinks in the Red Bar is sad, but oh how we giggle with Darren the windswept and interesting officer.

That’s all we have done for the last two weeks really is roll around with laughter. I don’t know what we were all on tonight but once Darren started to giggle like a girl again at the dinner table that started me off and a bit of a chain reaction worked its way half way around the table. He was helpless with laughter and couldn’t even compose himself to give Vrach his order, so I think Vrach pretty much guessed that he would want a little of everything as usual. Jeeper how we laughed this evening. My tummy hurt I laughed so much and I couldn’t even look across to Mr Flowers without starting all over again., Darren needed coffee for the first time this cruise. I do hope he didn’t start chuckling on his way t his cabin or they might have called the medics to him. He has been an absolute Star and a fantastic host.

One final drink in ‘MickTropolis’ just to calm us down and then I have to go and face those dam cases! Im tired, grumpy and hot but it has to be done. All bags are sealed, tagged and locked and put outside our cabin door, lets just hope they make it to East Midlands airport at the same time as us and in one piece.

Friday 27^th February 2009 ~ Barbados

My eyes open at 20 to 6 and I can just see the sun rising. We approach Barbados dock as a very slow pace and its just like we have never been away. Island Star and Boudicca are across the way and Sea Cloud and another masted vessel are following us in.

One final breakfast on the balcony and Mr C wants to let my Mr Fish, my birthday balloon, go but I cant face it just yet.

We have our cabin until 9.00am and could have taken a day room, on a first come first served basis, starting at £40 for an inside cabin, but I couldn’t really see the point as we intended to be out for most of the day, and we could have showered in the spa, but thankfully we had nice friends onboard who let us use there facilities. I packed the final few things into the hand luggage while Mr C attended immigration in Havana. Forms had been sent to the cabin a couple of days earlier with instructions of how to complete them so it was all pretty straight forward. But then it was time to let my birthday fish go. Probably the biggest realisation that the cruise really was over. I know that its not very environmentally friendly to let a helium balloon go free, but there was an awful lot of them flying off to sea. Fish went on his way quite nicely, threatening to go onto Island Star at one point but I talked him out of it, and he made it over the breaker wall and out to sea.

Hand luggage could be left in the Areana theatre this morning, but we obviously arrived at the wrong time as the two queues were snaking back through Ramblas. Amanda and Mick had used the facility much earlier than us and had walked straight in without queuing. We decided to park our stuff into a friends cabin and were then free to go ashore. What amazed me was the amount of passengers just sitting around in the public rooms, in their going home clothes, with hand luggage at their feet, and sat reading a book or a newspaper! It was just like a Southampton morning. It left me scratching my head and asking myself why? Non of the flights departed the ship before noon, the sun was shining outside and Barbados was sitting there waiting to greet them. Bizarre!

We were undecided about going to a beach, but as liquid sunshine was threatening we decided to just walk along to the craft village on the main road. We thought we could chill out with a drink while looking at crafts but we forgot all about the laid back Caribbean opening times. We had almost given up when one bar decided to open and we spent the morning sitting in the blazing sun drinking ice cold drinks and browsing the local shops.

At noon we drifted back to the ship for a burger at Frankies, listening to the steel band by the Laguna pool, and drinking ice cold water! Water! Yes we could still use our charge card right up until disembarkation but we chose to drink water! Our flight should have disembarked at 2.15pm and we were a little concerned not to hear any announcements so we drifted down to Ramblas to check the plasma screens in the Atrium only to find we had a 3 hour flight delay. Oh big sigh, that’s all we needed. We sat in the coolness of Ramblas until it was finally announced that we were too disembark. Coaches were there on the dock side. We were lucky and had a small comfy mini bus but oh boy did he go the long way around! Obviously, instructed to kill some time. We had already done the check in bit onboard the ship so only needed to do the security screening. Then that was it. Reality hit. We were sat in a warm, stuffy airport for the next 3 hours or so waiting for news of our fight. Instead of a 5.15 take off we were scheduled for a 8.20 take off, and the board just kept stating delayed! Then all of a sudden we were called and we looked like we might actually take off at 8.20pm. we were first on the plane and sat in our seats. At this point I really thought there was going to be a bit of plane rage. The guy in the isle seat next to Mr C had a right whinge about his over head locker already being full, so he tried ours and that was full. I nearly screamed ‘the one next to it is empty’ but I knew it wouldn’t pacify him. Then he decided he had lost something and was insistent that the cabin crew went to find it, but they just wanted the plane in the air before they lost the slot. His wife was rambling on about the plane will have to wait! Oooh I think not! Thankfully the ground crew found his missing item and he stopped his ramblings for a while.

The flight for me was horrendous. I was very ill and just needed it to end as quickly as possible. But the air hostess was lovely and offered me the jump seat to sit in, but the thought of everyone staring at me made me to decide to just curl up n my own seat with a blanket over my head. How I got off the plane at East Mids I do not know, and the passport control man had to study my passport picture to double check that the wreck standing infront of him really was the person in the photo. Cases seemed to take forever but in reality I think it was the same amount of time that they always take. The walk to the car was freezing one, yes we were back in Britain on a cold and frosty February morning.

A few other notes……..

In all of the ports we chose to do our own thing, getting a taxi to take us where we wanted to go. Usually I consider most cruise lines organised excursions to be a little bit too pricey but the way the £ is against the $ at the moment the P&O prices were working out quite comparatively. However, if there a re few of you that can share a car or mini bus it will probably still work out more economically to get your own cab, that way you are in control of the day. Most places you can haggle for a price with the taxi operators and don’t take the first one that you speak to, usually the further away you get from the ship, the more desperate they are to give you a good price. Truth is I normally make up the extra in tips anyway so they don’t loose out. I confess that I will miss seeing Matt at the end of the pier every morning. He obviously loves his job in the Explore team and is always happy to give advice on what to see etc. he has arranged some fab diving trips for Mr C so he is one satisfied customer.

Dress code really surprised me. I really did think that because the main dress code was ‘smart casual’ and it was a fly cruise with restrictions on luggae allowance etc, that the majority would be in ‘daywear’ in the evenings. Wrong! Seems most ladies had the same thoughts as me and were going to wear their nice cocktail dresses in the evening. Dress code wise for ladies I didn’t find it very much different to what a Southampton cruise would be and there were as many informal cocktail dresses as there were smart casual type outfits. Majority of gents did wear a shirt with collar and smart trousers in the evenings and so it wasn’t as bad as I had feared. Formal nights were very well adhered to with some beautiful outfits emerging. If the dress code is as good as this for the Southampton sailings then the dropping of semi formal nights shouldn’t really be an issue. If inm honest I still do prefer to see gents in a suit and tie on informal evenings, but then im old fashioned. My Dad would wear a collar and tie every night of his cruise apart from tropical night so that’s the way I would prefer it to be. But each to their own. Yes I did see the odd one or two that hadn’t dressed accordinigly but I can only hope that they had eaten in the buffet dining and were simply en route from A to B when I spotted them. As long as P&O don’t allow the dress code to become relaxed completely, and maybe they could consider changing the suggested dress code wording to ‘elegant casual’ and then maybe they wont get quite so many different interpretations.

I say this everytime but I do wish P&O would shake up the Portunus benefits. Special event Goldie lunch in the restaurant, cocktail party, and a china mug. Being brand loyal leaves me feeling as if P&O don’t really care. A shakeup is long overdue. I did miss my favourite Loyalty Manager, Justn. He brings that little bit of a buzz to the ship, makes you feel welcome and special, but he was on leave.

The entertainment, well what can I say? Well done P&O. a step in the right direction. Where were all the tradional P&O favourites? The entertainers that have been telling the same gags and singing the same songs on a P&O stage since the year dot? Yippee, there was not one in sight. Instead we had tribute acts in the form of Neil Diamond, Elton John, Robbie Williams, Brian Connelly. Ok I admit I never quite found the time to go and sit through an entire show, but I did pop my head into Havana most nights and the place was packed to the rafters with a lot of people resorting to watching on the plasma screens at the back. I did think that some of them were literally murdering some of the songs but in all fairness that could have been because I wasn’t fully in the room and couldn’t hear the sound system correctly. I did stick my head in the back of the theatre a couple of times and what I saw was good, but I had seen every show and so had no desire to sit and watch them again. Although Chronicles does captivate me and I love the bit where the acrobats come on and do their balancing bit. If you ike theatre productions I can see no reason why you wouldn’t have been impressed with any of the shoes. There were some good bands, Inspiration were excellent both on deck and in Tamarind and the dance floor was always packed for them. For those of you that like ballroom dancing, yes there was two dance instructors onboard who were there hosting most evenings and held dance classes during the day.

The steel band were excellent and really added to the atmosphere. Some nights they would be out on deck and others they would be down in the Atrium so we go the benefit of them in Red Bar too. I often walked past and saw ladies dancing to them down in the Atrium.

The little Japanese pianist was  a delight to listen too she could play literally anything you asked for and could adapt to the mood. The Spanish guitarist in Ramblas was excellent and I enjoyed listening to him set the scene for us. He was always playing during the lunch time and evening.

Metropolis had found its little niche as the late nightclub of the ship. The small band that they sometimes had on were a little bit dodgy at times but I don’t think balsting it full blast out of every speaker was helping. The late night discos were always popular and for some reason they seemed to have the balance of music levels correct with it being quiet enough to hold a conversation over at the bar end of the room.

Noddy was a lot more visible and was often out and about for photos etc. Scalextric was very low key and I never even heard anyone say they had been to even look at it this time. Cirque Ventura as I say is more or less no more, with the trampolines still there behind its cages, it doesn’t look quite so inviting and is such a puzzle how to actually get to it now that im sure most people must give up before they arrive. I was very tempted to have a go but my back was really giving me some jip towards the end of the cruise and Captain Clarke assured me that it would be there for a while longer so maybe next time.

Oh dear, this is just about my only whinge. Public announcements. I thought it was great last year when we didn’t get Art auction announcements because there was no need for them as the art gallery was there 24/7. but now they have reinvented a whole new catalogue of things to make public announcements about. You get a bing bong from the ents team at about 10.00 am telling you whats going on, then early afternoon to tell you whats on in the afternoon and sometimes, bing bong they are back again early evening to gently remind you whats on. Tours might have a little bing bong and then shops would chip in with a bit, but oh the most annoying one of all was Bing Bong this is Mark Tomely your Food & Beverage Manager to tell you about this evenings dining options onboard Ventura’ Ok the first two nights I though, fair enough tell people whats on offer, but every night? It was the longest winded announcement of them all. He spoke so fast I thought a high speed train must have been on his tail and one night he actually nearly choked for lack of breath. Im sure there was some sort of bet on to see how fast he could say it.

The dining options now are excellent. I didn’t hear one moan about Freedom dining. When I used it last May I would phone each morning at 7.30am to reserve a table for us at our chosen time. It worked for me but didn’t work for the majority. Now they have done away with all pre reserving and you simply turn up to Cinnamon when you are ready.

The BeachHouse turned into an American diner at night time with waiter service and we were hearing very good reports about the steaks etc. but there were never enough days in the week for us and sadly we never got the chance to try it out.

I was determined to try MPW this time as that too was also getting excellent reviews and we spoke to disembarking passengers at breakfast who had gone there 3 times it was so good, but again we just never got around to it. I wanted to go on our first evening onboard and just chill out on the aft deck with a nice relaxed meal, but when we went along to book they were already full so it just never happened after that.

East As I have reported was superb. I love the place and highly recommend it. I have never seen East so busy as it was this cruise but it didn’t seem to affect service in anyway and the waitresses in there are lovely. The option of pre dinner tapas was a nice addition and although I couldn’t manage those as well as a meal Mr C really enjoyed them.

Afternoon tea is served both in the self service buffet areas and in the Saffron. We did manage to fit that in on the last day, but for me I would only need afternoon tea if I was giving up an evening meal.

Room service we used most days for breakfast and found it easier to pick up the phone and order when we were ready for it. Pre ordering the night before seemed very hit and miss with times. Mr C always used to amuse me because he always ordered 2 teaspoons and 4 pats of butter, but in all fairness if he didn’t mention it they never seemed to materialise. The lad always returned for the tray within the hour and we never had to place it outside the door. The only other time I recall using room service was when I was working and needed a cold drink so was extremely lazy and picked up the phone to order a couple of cans of sprite and fanta. ‘Oh we don’t have sprite and fanta mam’. Fair enough I thought, the room service cupboard below decks doesn’t stock everything I will have cokes and lemonade. I was really surprised when a deck steward turned up with my cans, so if he got them from a bar why couldn’t I have the sprite and fanta? Needles to say my lesson was learnt and I didn’t trouble room service again for a drink, I kept it stocked myself from the deck bars.

Im not the biggest foodie in the world so probably aren’t the best person to comment on the food in the main restaurants but I didn’t think that it was up to P&O’s usual standard. Maybe that was something to do with the act that she was positioned over in the Caribbean for months on end and access to usual suppliers was a logistical nighmare? But lamb was on the menu most days, where did all the lambs come from, im not a lamb lover so that always took out one main before I had had chance to look at the rest. Most people seemed to enjoy the meals so maybe it was just me?

Im tired of hearing about sunbeds on Ventura. I can tell you from vast experience that  the situation is no different to any other main stream cruise ship afloat. They are always lined up in rows, always have less than 0.5 of a centimetre gap between beds and always since as long as I can remember have been reserved by those with less manners. I had no trouble getting a sun bed when I wanted one, and yes when I had nothing better to do with my day I did stroll length and breadth of the main decks to observe if there were any beds available, and yes there were! You just need to not set your heart on sitting in any one specific spot. I saw plenty on the Lido deck and more than that on the smaller annexe decks above. P&O did police it as I witnessed it with my own eyes one day, and I have to say that if I was desperate and wanted to be at in a spot where I knew nodody had sat on that chair for a reasonable length of time I would respectfully tidy the book and towel away and sit on it. I was more than happy to sit on my balcony and enjoy the peace and quiet later in the day, but I never did see that many other people doing the same.

As someone who is normally bitten to pieces by the mossies in the Caribbean I was determined to find a good defence from them before I went on this cruise. I was told about vitamin B1. So I eventually tracked such capsules down and purchased a months supply. I started taking two weeks before departure and continued to take daily throughout the cruise. In addition to that I went out onto the balcony every port day morning and sprayed my lower legs and feet with a cocktail of sprays and potions that had been pre purchased. I wouldn’t like to have to spray them in a confined space because it was pungent stuff. I was very conscious of the fact that I did have quite a smell about me for the first couple of hours but as long as the mossies kept away, that was fine by me. In the past I have been bitten so much that it has reduced me to tears, and once you have the bites I find there isn’t much that will take the sting away. Others in our party had followed the same advice and purchased a supply of B1 tablets, but they all complained of horrid tastes and hard to swallow large tablets. Mine were in small capsule format and never gave me any problems so you might have to shop around.

We were on the Friday departure, which meant that we flew out of the UK on the Friday morning and our last day onboard was Friday, flying out on the Friday afternoon, landing back into the UK on Saturday morning. That left us with the first Saturday onboard to go ashore in Barbados, which im glad we did. The ship becomes like a waiting room to some people and it is very much a changeover day, even though all ship board services all operated in the same way. By the time we got back to the ship after our day out the Saturday arrivals were starting to embark and the last of the departure people were still dragging their overnight bags around with them. Some in our party had arrived on the Saturday and did say at the end that they felt like the last day of her holiday in Barbados had been taken away from them. There were constant flight announcements etc and a lot of comings and goings, plus they knew she had to pack and be ready to disembark tomorrow, so arriving in Barbados was a bit of a day in limbo for them.

Ventura has come a long long way since her Maiden. I was lucky enough to go on her for an evening event pre Maiden and as some of you might recall I was not the slightest bit impressed with her. But then I went on the Maiden and I could see that she had a lot to offer, so I nipped back on for two weeks in May and that’s when I really began to appreciate Ventura and her facilities. No she isn’t like the other ships but that’s a good thing in my opinion. Each ship in the P&O fleet has her own individual personality and offers different things to different people. That has to be a good thing. At least P&O don’t build ships on mass and make them all the same.I think she came into her own in the Caribbean. All those balcony’s all that sunshine. The atmosphere onboard was great and you could tell that the majority of the passengers were there to have a good time and to get on with their long awaited holiday. The age range was much lower than the average P&O Mediterranean cruise, some families but mostly couples. And it was obvious that most of these people were on holiday to have a good time as everywhere was always very lively.

Now, I have read quite a few reports from people saying that it is like Butlins at sea onboard. Well, I don’t know how they have made that comparison because Butlins it is not! Some people don’t seem to like the sailaway deck party’s and the ‘silly hand movements’ well, it’s a big ship, move away from the Laguna Pool and Breakers Bar at these advertised times and you can find peace and tranquillity just around the corner. Clearly there were more people that enjoyed this sort of fun that didn’t as the sailaway parties were always packed to the rafters and Neil and the Team did everything they could to get the whole deck dancing and singing. I love the deck parties, whether Im taking part, observing from the bar or enjoying from my balcony watching the ship alongside look in envy at us.

So the question a lot of people want to know the answer to ……. Which is my favourite P&O ship in the fleet now? Aurora or Ventura? ………………….

Well, without a shadow of a doubt its Ventura for me! She has so much more to offer, cabins are nicer, I have my internet access without having to leave my cabin, so many more dining options, different evening entertainment, a larger choice of venues, different zones and areas within the open deck space, all in all she gives me more choice! After my initial overnight visit on her pre launch I was one of the first to say, what the heck have P&O done. I openly admitted I did not like Ventura at all, and had made up my mind she was not going to fit in. Im fortunate that I have been able to go on her for 3 cruises now and oh how she has grown on me with each one. So what a turn around I have made. She has grew on me more and more with each cruise I have had on her, and now I have to be her No.1 Fan. Give Ventura a chance, dont judge her on first initial impressions or what you might have read about her. She is a fantastic ship with a lot to offer.

Im really looking forward to seeing Azura and I think she will offer all that Ventura does plus that little bit extra!